The Meaningfulness of Life, Part 2

Ian and I have been spending less since our transition from DINKs (Dual Income No Kids) to SINKs.  When we both worked, we spent money like we were filming a Lil Wayne video, but instead of Range Rovers and Cristal we spent our money on chocolate molten cakes at Chili’s and 3-D movies at the fancy theater downtown.  And Coke Icees - maybe mixed with cherry if we felt really adventurous.  

Of course we’ve cut back our spending since I left my job.  I still get Coke Icees, but we eat more meals at home, limit our shopping trips, and only go to the movies for a must-see film instead of just as a fun activity. (This summer’s must-see movies have been Thor, Captain America, Crazy Stupid Love, and - coming up next - The Help.  I’m sure you can figure out which ones were my choices.)  

Here’s the thing:  I think that spending less is making our lives more meaningful, maybe even happier.   Like I said in my last post, the rarer the opportunity, the more special it becomes.  Since we’ve been spending less, the times that we splurge are more special.

It makes sense, right?  In a world where serotonin boosts are inexpensive and easily accessible - whether through $1 tubs of soda at McDonald’s or a cheap plane ticket abroad - maybe we can’t depend on our purchases alone to maximize our pleasure.  Perhaps to truly maximize the happiness we get from an experience or an item, we need to withhold it from ourselves because rarefying availability increases desirability.  In other words, absence makes the heart grow fonder.  

Since the recession hit a few years ago, I’ve come across a few articles about the relation between conspicuous consumption and happiness.  I now know that after you pay the bills, you’re better off spending your money on experiences like travel and rock climbing than on new handbags.  I've also learned that anticipation of a purchase is a big contributor to the happiness you get from the purchase itself, as explained in this New York Times article:

Before credit cards and cellphones enabled consumers to have almost anything they wanted at any time, the experience of shopping was richer, says Ms. Liebmann of WSL Strategic Retail. “You saved for it, you anticipated it,” she says.  In other words, waiting for something and working hard to get it made it feel more valuable and more stimulating.  In fact, scholars have found that anticipation increases happiness. Considering buying an iPad? You might want to think about it as long as possible before taking one home. Likewise about a Caribbean escape: you’ll get more pleasure if you book a flight in advance than if you book it at the last minute.

I totally get it.  If you’ve read a few of my other entries here, you know I joke around about loving Chipotle.  I do; I capital L Love Chipotle.  As my former work colleagues can attest, I used to get Chipotle for lunch at least twice during the work week (and then again on the weekends).  I ate there so often that the employees at the Michigan Avenue Chipotle in downtown Chicago - undoubtedly one of the busiest in the country - they knew me so well that they jokingly made me order in Spanish.  Thank God “guacamole” is the same in all languages.

But I only eat there once a week now.  And guess what?   I look forward to that burrito bowl like it’s a long-lost lover I haven’t seen in years.  I sit down with my cilantro-lime rice creation of deliciousness and watch my Real Housewives and I’m so happy that it might as well be Christmas morning.  

Of course, as a red-blooded American, I can’t escape the desire to have more - more money, more clothes, more square footage, more, more, more... So I sporadically get pangs of longing, sprinkled with guilt, to be DINKs again to satisfy those “more” desires.  And maybe we will be someday.  Who knows.  But then I remember the warmth of the bread I made from scratch, the bike riding down the Monon Trail, the couch cuddling watching the DVD at home, planting the garden with our family - all done to be more cost-conscious.  So with less money, maybe we’re richer than before.